?

Log in

Recent Exits Things That Are Outside calendar Way In? EPU Previous Previous Next Next
Bad Style Roundup - Way Out
this way to the fabulous egress
z_gryphon
z_gryphon
Bad Style Roundup
Just for fun, I'm going to answer all the rhetorical questions currently visible as headlines on CNN's front page.

Did stowaway hibernate? No. Don't be stupid.

Proof of undercover Russian troops? This is not a sentence; it has no subject. Try again.

Is Bieber getting special treatment? Probably. From whom?

Will skeleton solve 1979 cold case? No. Skeletons, except in Ray Harryhausen films, are inanimate. They cannot take action.

What does driving get you, anyway? To my destination, generally.

Why did rancher fight feds? Some motherfucker's always trying to ice-skate uphill.

Should Justice Ginsburg resign? I think you mean "retire". Also, that is surely none of your business.

Want green cities? Not especially; that's what the countryside is for. Lose the cars. Answering your own rhetorical question is even worse form than asking one in the first place.

How much sin can Bourdain take? Oh, quite a lot, I should imagine; have you not read Kitchen Confidential?

Bad day? Fuckin' right. Smash some stuff! What did I tell you about that?

See what I did there? And there? And - oh, good grief, this could cascade indefinitely.

Just say yes to 'study drugs'? I'm sorry, what?

So you have HIV, now what? Well, I can only speak for myself, but I would imagine the opening stages would be something like a) panic b) puzzlement as to the vector and c) bitter recrimination. And then, since I believe Governor LePage has vetoed the Medicaid expansion in Maine four times on the trot at this point, a rapid, terminal decline, since it would therefore go entirely untreated. Thanks for reminding me of the precariousness of my position again, by the way.

Current Location: ye toole cribbe
Current Mood: not impressed
Current Music: the siren song of the machine tool lab

1 note or Leave a note by the exit
Comments
solipsistnation From: solipsistnation Date: April 21st, 2014 09:50 pm (UTC) (Link)

She's the only Orthodox female rabbi in Salt Lake City, Utah! He's a fleshless animated skeleton! They're detectives!

Also: http://oglaf.com/bascinet/ (SFW for once, but don't hit forward or back or you may have a surprise.)
1 note or Leave a note by the exit